Not Until I Find What I'm Lookin' For

I have a jacket/hat pin that looks identical to this, except everything that isn't the guitar body is gold-colored.  I am offering a cash reward for this; I lost it at school.  I will not be writing any more posts until I find it; I must focus on finding this pin.  Someone that I admire greatly gave it to me and it means a lot to me.  If anyone has seen it, please contact me.  Please.

Cheetos

There are regular cheetos, and there are asshole cheetos.
behold.  The nice, regular cheetos.  They have a happy, cheddar-y flavor.

...and then there's this.  These cheetos barely taste any different.  The only major difference is that these kick the crap out of your mouth.  They're assholes.  Why?

The only thing that I can think of is that they have a lot of pent-up rage against society.  Which I understand, but seriously?  It's not even funny!

Poem III

Come with me into the Great Unknown

I'll show you things that books could have never shown

Walk steady now, lest you stumble and fall

Be calm, head high, down this worn and wary hall

Come with me, and you will see

Eveything this doorway can be

Poem II

White Walls

Stolen by the beauty

I forgot to breathe

But over there, I see you

With pure hatred do you seethe

I lock the doors, sheck the windows

Barely can I sleep

For it is my life, I fear for,

Something you wish to reap.

For now only I can see you,

No one believes that you're there.

My sanity is the real target,

It is at that do you tear.

You have won, you may collect your prize

But long ago defeated me

You won't end this, despite my endless cries.

Now I sit in a white room

Without even you for a companion

All I have is a memory that takes my breath away

In my now-empty world that is an endless canyon.

How I Got Out of School 20 Minutes Early

My doctors' appointment.  I went to it and found out that I have a concussion and costochondritis.  Now I'm not allowed to do much physical activity until I haven't had a headache for a solid week.  What a drag.  How am I going to get into shape for soccer?  At least I got to leave Biology 20 minutes early to walk to the hospital, only to have to navigate a path to the other side to the family something something clinic or something like that.  But yay for missing 20 minutes of school!  For costochondritis I have to take anti inflammatory pills and go to a physical therapist.  What a drag.  I got an X-ray on my hip, it was pretty cool I guess.  They always ask if I'm pregnant (they do this with every girl).  It's like, um hell no I'm not knocked up, are you bloody joking me?  The first time that they asked me I was younger and I was completely baffled.  When my sister was in the E.R. for her guinea pig bite, the old lady in the bed next to her kept asking if she was pregnant.  My sister was a junior in high school I'm pretty sure, but she looked like she was 13.  The old lady kept asking us really odd questions.  She told the doctors that her name was Thomas Jefferson.  Insane woman.  The moral of the story:  get out of class (that you don't really really like) any way that you can.

Poem I

What is death but a mere gateway to another domain?
I call it a gate, but you call me insane.

You call it a beast, something feared by all men;

But when you pass through it, what do you say it then?
Heaven or Hell, where will you go?
Most fhope for the first, others believe nothing is so.

I still call it a gateway

And yet here you still call me insane.

I wrote this like two years ago... I just recently found a whole host of poems under my bed.  I'll probably put them all up on here.  My favorite is Dog.  The begining line is very similar to Kings and Queens by Aerosmith.

Doctor

     My hip has been acting up again and I finally caved and asked my mother dearest to get me a doctor's appointment.  I feel like a wimp.  It's actually for my hip and sternum.  Oh well.  So I'm getting a bike pretty soon (hopefully).  I'm getting an old 10 speed bike.  I think that they're super rad.
     Man, I need money though.  I need to find like little odd jobs and whatnot that I can do to make some cash.  Any ideas?  Ah, speaking of transportation other than cars, I don't want to wear shoes.  I walk to places and around school, and shoes are just such a drag.  I used to love them, like I was all for shoes all the time, but now it's just like.. yeah, man.  No shoes is the best way to go.  We do have feet for a reason.  It's some stupid law that people have to wear shoes while at school, unfortunately.  I can only get away with so much..  Well, not wearing shoes is very much fun and I suggest you try this one day.  Hint:  for best results, try it on a nice sunny day.
     Love.  You gotta love nature, I mean, come on.  Where would we be without it?  We'd all be dead, that's for sure.  I like the Guns 'n' Roses version of Live and Let Die.  This quote is up somewhere in my great aunts house I think.  Somewhere that has something to do with her, at least.  She is the person that I adore most on this planet.

"I do my thing, and you do your thing. I am not tin this world to live up to your expectations, and you are not in this world to live up to mine. You are you, and I am I, and if by chance we find each other, it's beautiful."

-Frederick E. Perl

Love Robin Williams Like Me

Ok, I really need you guys to watch this Robin Williams video.  I can not stress to you how hilarious (and true) this is.  I mean, seriously, why on earth would they consider weed a performance enhancing drug?  You're lucky if you can perform regularly, let alone enhanced.  I abolutely love him, and this is just great.
WARNING:  Do not play this during a class or in a public place if you don't have headphones.  It's not vulgar, it's just not exactly.. well..  all aged appropriate.  Now that I rewatch this, there are a few swear words in the first five minutes... but it's great.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nIWB-Neyj-c&feature=related
Alcohol and drugs are... well, they are a matter of opinion.
Golf-my dad wanted me to play it, but at the last minute I opted for track instead.  I'm really glad that I did; track is way more awesome than golf.  I played golf in 7th or 8th grade.  It was fun, yeah, but I would never want to play in against good people.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u9oKdUFCoVo

Crayon Week!

     Brower and I have another themed week.  Matching colors.  Our pants are to match out tops.  Unfortunately, I cut the leg off of my purple pants and I can't find my blue pants.  I will find them, I assure you.  I just hope I can keep up with Brower.  She's a trooper, I'll tell you that.  I will need to look into buying pants from, oh say, a thrift store!  Like the ones down town.  Gotta love Brower.  Speaking of Brower, she was GONE all of last week!  I was so sad.  No fun advisory for us.  I still love advisory the most.  On a completely related note, I still need to buy canvas and makeup for my newest and most exciting Johnny Cash project:  Johnny made out of makeup.  It will not be an easy task, and I will have an extremely difficult time relinquishing my custody of it.

Asians

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r4bzHHxhfdk&feature=BFp&list=FL33oA_jFBwZY&index=3
Watch it.  I had to find this by typing "laughing asian children" into the Youtube browser.  My head hurts and my eyes feel funny.  WHAT IS GOING ON?!
I will have the songs that are playing on the radio stuck in my head all night until I fall asleep.  I totally thought that I just saw a spider, but turns out it's just a book shelf shadow... not sure how they look anything alike...   OM NOM NOM YODA!!!  As my sister and I say.  My dog is trying to murder me with her eyes.  She is so pissed that we're still awake.  She had to wake up at 6:40 (I slept in hardcore and so did she) but she went to bed at like midnight, so she wants to go to bed.  I should really be waiting on her hand and foot (paw and paw?) right now for being such a good sport.  But I'm not.  She's just going to have to suck it up.  Oh, look at the time... I get to sleep all day to-morrow.  But not really.  Just until around 10.  Which is after I'll probably wake up.  If I wake up.  I might die or go into a coma, you never know.  He's climbin in yo windows, snatchin you people up...  I'll be back.  Bock.  I'll be bock.  Much better.

     Hey look at that, I'm back.  Well, I never really left.  I've been watching Robin Williams for about an hour...  "You're still there, you never left!"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nIWB-Neyj-c&feature=related
Man I love this guy.  I haven't laughed this much or this hard in months.  I had no idea he had so many hilarious things to say.

Jack and Jill

    Here's a story for you.  I was sitting on the bus with the track team and we were passing around leg rollers (something about lactic acid I think, I don't use them so I have no idea) and they were headed back towards the front of the bus.  I turned around to see something I think, although I don't even remember what exactly I was doing now that I try to recall, and my friend went to pass it up and it hit me right on my eyebrow and that stupid bone underneath it.  I had a heacache for the rest of the day and the following day.  Later the next night (the night after the day of the accident) I was letting my dog out and I had my head down because the light from outside was making my headache even worse.  What did I end up doing?  I opened the door really fast and hit myself right in the exact same frickin spot that I was hit the day before.  How?  I'm stupid.  There is no reasonable reason for that to have happened.  I feel like I'm in a fog or something.  It's really hard to explain.  Now I keep falling asleep doing random things and every once in a while it feels like the ground is moving.  Am I on drugs?  No, absolutely not.  Pain?  To the extreme.  I have had a migrane for the past two days.  But enough about misery, it was hilarious.  I just smacked myself on the face!  I'm awesome.  Don't even kid yourself.  Oh, and I had no idea what to title this post.  Have fun with that.

Monday Is Going To Rock For Once

I have been debating these past few weeks quite thoroughly.  I made a deal with Brower to wear a dress or skirt every day this week and the previous week.  The original deal was one week, but then she really wanted to go for a second week.  How could I say no to her?  I'll try to put up pictures of every dress/skirt that I wore.  I didn't have to repeat any outfits.  That is to say, I have enough skirts and dresses (although if I wanted to, I could have worn all dresses) to wear a different one every day for two (school) weeks.  Brower, you scoundrel.  I can't wait for next Monday.  I will wear my Ozzy shirt.  And pants.  Very pants-y pants.  And not wear a skirt/dress to school for a very long time.  Hopefully.  I love pants.  They make life better.  They would deserve a spot in the Rock 'n' Roll Hall of Fame instead of ABBA.  That just disgusts me.  Pants did play a key roll, though.  Elvis wore cigarette pants.  Mic Jagger wore cigarette pants.  Poison wore cigarette pants. Steven Tyler?  Skin-tight low-cut pants.  Rob Halford?  Leather (leather, hell-bent for leather) pants.  Mötley Crüe wore spandex.  They strutted their stuff!  I would too, if I was in a band like Aerosmith or Mötley Crüe.  Man, I wish I was around for the 60's and 70's and 80's music as it was happening..

    On a completely unrelated note, Allie Brosh is writing a book!  A real one, too!  Like, we can all buy it!  Yay!
http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2011/05/d.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+Hyperbole-and-a-half+%28Hyperbole-And-A-Half%29

Happy Birthday II

Happy birthday Jenna!  You are such an amazing person, you have no idea how awesome I think you are.  You're nice and funny and sensible.  You know what's up.  Thanks for helping me and not exploding when I am being awkward or just plain dumb.  Sure, you're not a music fanatic, but not everybody needs to be one to be wicked cool.  Harry Potter?  Oh hell yeah.  You even named your two cats after stuff from the book.  I have yet to real any of Jodi Picoult's books, but if you like them then they must be good.  I hope you like the card, I had to flat iron that bill and dig out my stapler from the depths of my dresser.  I can't thank you enough for everything.  You've even come up with a plan to help me get in shape for soccer.  Soccer sounds mondo.  I am looking forward to it, though.  I am terrible at anything slightly involving athleticism, though, and I apologize in advance for the upcoming season.  You rock at javelin and I learned a lot from you.  I'll miss you when you move.  Keep being smart funny and all around awesome for another year, Jenna!

Children?

Oh, children...   I hope to not have any for the next few years.  By that I mean in wedlock.  Because EFF being a single mother.  Seriously.  I mean, I'm already weird enough, and I think that trying to parent something that will be able to talk and think for itself will make me snap.  Not like the show Snapped, but like going-insane-type snapped.  And not murdering anyone.  Can you imagine what my kids would be like?  Ha, yeah me either.  Even with a husband, that thought is terrifying.  Shelly with a baby?  Oh dear..

"We're all mad here."

On a related note, I would only show them old shows and movies.  And old music.  Steven Victor, Tommy Lee, Casey Murie (not sure on the spelling..).  Maybe Alice, too.  That one is for the fourth child.  Or second girl.  If I have two boys, a girl, and then another boy, these names stay.   My kids already hate me.

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w8a586ijjBQ&feature=relmfu

Autobiographies

  I have three books which I love the most.  I have Walk This Way, Life, and I am Ozzy.  They are all autobiographies of people that I aspire to be like.  Aerosmith, Keith Richards, and Ozzy Osbourne.  I am going to buy the Steven Tyler book that comes out in may.  It's about $30, and it would be worth it for me.  I bought the Aerosmith book about a year ago, give or take a few weeks.  I found it at a used book store in Bellingham, and so I had to buy it.  Aerosmith!!  How could I say no?  I got the Keith Richards book (Life) back in December of 2010 for helping my aunt go Christmas shopping.  I just recently purchased the Ozzy book.  I was at the mall with my mates and I didn't eat dinner when we went out (I enjoy penny pinching; that Les Paul is not cheap.)  Anyways, I saw it at the book store in the mall and, since my parents weren't there with me to say no, I bought it with what was supposed to be money for dinner.  I would gladly go without dinner for a book about a musician that I idolize.  On a side note, be sure to check out the song of the day!